September 11th is definitely a day that will stick in our minds forever. Saying, "We will never forget," seems a little cliche, yet still very accurate.
I look at this day through different glasses now. The widowhood initiation for them was sudden and tragic nine years ago. I often wonder if they ever want to STOP sharing the death anniversary of their loved one with the entire country. I know for me, that day was not one to celebrate, commemorate, or exalt. It was a day that I wanted to spend by myself... within my own thoughts. I didn't need or want other people sharing this day with me. I want to celebrate his life, not his death. I can't help but wonder if the 9/11 widows ever feel this way.
Make no mistake, I don't feel we should ever forget the death of our loved ones, just be free to handle the death anniversary in a not so public manner.
Maybe after I have nine years under my "widow belt" I will feel differently, but this year, in this moment, I feel for the widows that never get to acknowledge their spouse's death without the whole country watching.
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The Grief Shift9 years ago
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Total Mass Confusion~9 years ago
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The New PostSecret Book10 years ago
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5 Years Ago Today10 years ago
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You Wanna Be a Rock Star?14 years ago
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3 comments:
Interesting thoughts - challenging ones. I have discovered that we all grieve differently. Some, perhaps need to the outward attention, and many others prefer to not put their grief on display. When my wife was going through her cancer surgeries, I wanted to be left alone, but my role as a minister prevented me from being able to do that. I think that I would be a lot more like you if I faced death in such a personal way.
Very Interesting.
God has been the difference in my own life during times of loneliness, heartbreak, and pain. I know too well what it means of not getting encouraged by others and the hurt that comes from that. I've found that only God always offer encouragement and hope, much better than any human can offer. I can only imagine how it feels to be widowed. I have the taste of having an emotional tie broken- I've gotten dumped in the past and it's hurt me so much in the past. The Bible teaches that a sexual relationship (whether marital or premarital) results in the man and woman becoming one body (refer to 1 Corinthians 6:16). I think this bond resonates to the spiritual level of their souls. I believe that even an emotional involvement (without having sex) also creates emotional ties, but probably to a lesser degree than sexual ties (which unites them as one body in a spiritual sense). Our bodies are connected with our inner being (soul, spirit, heart and mind). When our brain forms memories of things we are fond of (people, places, objects, etc.), our bodies long for those things when they are taken away from us. This physical longing resonates to our inner being. It’s all quite complex and mysterious of how our physical body and inner being operate in relation to each other. Rejection and abandonment are all painful things. King Solomon said that everything in this world is vanity, everything is meaningless- a chasing after the wind. Eventually whatever we gain in this world (relationships, success, wealth), we lose them all at some point. There is something you can never lose though- God. God surpasses everything in our lives. Our thirsting for things in this world (especially human relationships) is evidence that we need something greater than those things to satisfy us because everything except God will end up failing you in some way. God has promised us that He will never leave us nor forsake us. God can't die on us and leave us in a state of loneliness. God won't cheat on us, dump us and go off with someone else. Whenever you feel lonely or feel that you're missing something in your life- realize that God wants to fill that void in your life. So many times I've been ignorant about the Bible. We're trained from our birth to live by our senses- thus we look to perceive God with those senses. Most of the time, we can't perceive God with our senses as He is a spiritual being. God has wanted me to develop my spiritual senses and rely on His word (the Bible) to experience Him. I've learned to always see God's word as alive, powerful, and relevant for each day. When I've failed to see that in the past, it's robbed me so much joy and peace. I've learned to look at the Bible as a powerful and active gateway/portal to God. We can try to occupy our minds with so many different things in this world to try and fill the void in our lives or suppress the pain, but all of those things will keep us still hungry and thirsty. God has promised us that if we reach out to Him, He will give us rest, quench our thirst, and satisfy our hunger. If you haven't done that, I hope you will give God a chance. 1 Corinthians 6:17 states that the one who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him. I think human relationships bond us in a powerful way (which is complex to understand), however, the Bible says that we can also be joined to God through our spirit (inner being), which I believe is even more powerful as God is the ultimate partner. God is an invisible Spirit who doesn’t have a physical body like we have. We have both a physical (the visible physical body) and spiritual component (invisible spiritual inner being). Hence, we need to seek out God with our spirit and be joined to Him as one spirit.
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