I know it's a lot of change, but I am craving an an overhaul... in so many ways. I want to keep the blog, it still holds such a special place in my heart. Bill never wanted it to end up as a memorial, and I am afraid that is how I saw it. I was feeling like my updates needed to be Bill/grief based and I was finding I didn't have much to report. By starting fresh I am simply keeping a blog of our family and the day-to-day trials of our new life.
Stay tuned...
I am officially back to work, so summer has come to an end. I have enjoyed being back and really like my new school. Today was the "turning point" and I feel like I will actually be ready for Tuesday when the kiddos come. This summer has been a true blessing. I am convinced that Bill waited until school was out so I wouldn't worry about missing work... yet he also planned it so I could have a summer to get things in order. He was always very thoughtful and only wanted me to be happy.Lately, I have been struggling with finding the words to describe how I feel... Not great, but not necessarily bad, either. I couldn't describe the exact the feeling (until now), but I just checked my work e-mail and a friend sent me a message and used the term "caregiver hangover"... THAT'S IT! I have a severe caregiver hangover. It's that little sick feeling that lingers the day after a fun-filled evening. It's the slight headache that is dull, but always there. It's being able to function, but not yet feeling 100%. I have a caregiver hangover that Advil and Denny's greasy food at 2am can't cure. ;) Thanks, Paul!!
